I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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