how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize