in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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