Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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