My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you will always have a special place in my vag
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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