He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize