He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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