you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
