this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
