At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
