Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize