either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
