Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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