Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
