apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
