We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize