Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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