You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
