She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize