I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
