He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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