he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
