whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize