He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
