Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
