Dual....:-)
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
love makes seman taste better
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
You made out with two different species that night
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
