i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize