Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
