I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
