I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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