The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
