It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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