If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize