Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
