best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
