Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize