My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I just want nice things and good sex
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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