Sponge bath it is.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
