it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
