pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
