You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
