K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
