you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize