So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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