You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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