She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
