in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
a search helicopter?!
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
