i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Randomize