let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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