is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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