need another drink. this is the easiest way
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I did not marry a roomba.
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